Friday, June 26, 2009

The Emperor's New Shoes

There have been many in a long line of annoyingly horrible shoe fads. As of late we've been seen Crocs, Uggs and those stupid peasant slippers that every skinny-jeaned she-douche hipster seems to come equipped with. Plus, let us not forget the "fanny pack" of all footwear: those stupid ass hiking sandals that look like something The Predator would wear to a weekend up to Big Sur, that ironically, always end up on the feet on the most obese and sedentary individuals to ever wear white socks.

With that being said I introduce to you the Vibram Five Fingers. (I guess the Five Toes had less of a ring to it.) And while they have been around for a while, there has been a marketing push as of late to make them next big thing. Even TIME magazine awarded them one of the best inventions of 2007. The website even claims that these glorified footie socks will "make you stronger and healthier, improve your balance, agility and proprioception"(whatever the fuck that is!) However, I was mildly shocked that the price range for these dorksiders range below the $100 mark.

And while I may be getting ahead of myself by predicting this trend , I'll bet you dimes to donuts that in few months we'll be seeing these in some big movie or tv show and then on the knock off aisle at Walgreens. I call shenanigans on the Vibram Five Fingers! Or should I say shoe-nanigans. Wah wah.

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